How they really feel
by deathhasswag
Summary: Tavros and Vriska share how they really feel. Maybe a vriska x tavros? or just a friendship thing really. Yeah friendship. (actual convo from pesterchum.) Kind of angsty.


**hey guys whats up? I just all up and had the most saddest sad stuck between me and vriska (I was the Tavros) on pesterchum. We both had cannon handles...It was so sad because Tavros reveals some of the stuff he gos through with gamzee...some other sad shti from vriska of how no matter what nature wants to screw her life over...Thats it. Anyway this is an actual convo on pesterchum I had. i delated where it has the seconds on most of them but half way through I get lazy... Anyway read it and weep! No really you'll cry. SAD STUCK **

- arachnidsGrip [AG] began pestering adiosToreador at 01:34 -

[01:34] AG: Taaaaaaaavros.

[01:34] AT: hEY VRISKA,

[01:35] AG: Did you just try to contact me? ::::o

[01:35] AT: nOPE,

[01:35] AT: i DIDN'T,

[01:35] AT: gLITCH MAYBE,

[01:35] AG: Yeah, guess that's a pretty legit excuse.

[01:36] AT: uH IM BEING HONEST,

[01:36] AG: L8r then, Toreadum8ass. ::::)

- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased pestering adiosToreador at 01:36 -

[01:36] AT: vRISKA,

[01:36] AT: i AM TIRED OF YOU BULLING ME,

[01:37] AG: Yeeeeeeees? ::::O

[01:37] AG: Uh...

[01:37] AT: i DON'T LIKE BEING CALLED A DUMBASS,

[01:37] AG: Well, I admire your newfound courage,

[01:38] AG: 8uuuuuuuut,

[01:38] AG: Its not enough.

[01:38] AG: L8r.

- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased pestering adiosToreador at 01:38 -

[01:38] AT: tHIS IS WHY i NEVER WANTED TO BE YOUR MATESRPITE,

[01:39] AG: Taaaaaaaavros,

[01:39] AG: Shut up, already.

[01:30] AG: I got it.

[01:30] AG: Go to Gamzee or whatever and love him up.

[01:39] AG: I never even had a chance to 8egin with...

[01:40] AT: i DON'T LIKE GAMZE EITHER THOUGH,

[01:40] AT: yOU ALL ASSUME i DO,

[01:40] AG: ...

[01:40] AG: What?

[01:41] AT: i DON'T LIKE GAMZEE,

[01:41] AT: i JUST DIDN'T WANT TO LOSE HIM AS A FRIEND,

[01:41] AG: ...

[01:41] AG: Then who have you 8een admiring all along?! ::::O

[01:42] AT: nO ONE,

[01:42] AT: yOU ALL JUST WANT ME TO LIKE SOMEONE,

[01:46] AG: You mean,

[01:40] AG: No one at all?

[01:46] - arachnidsGrip [AG] sighs. -

[01:46] AG: Goodnight, Tavros.

- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased pestering adiosToreador at 01:46 -

[01:47] AT: i MEAN i DON'T KNOW,

[01:47] AG: Its fine, whatever, 8ro.

[01:47] AT: nO ITS NOT,

[01:48] AT: yOUR A FRIEND,

[01:48] AT: yOU SHOULD DESERVE AN ANSWER,

[01:48] AG: I don't deserve anything, Tav.

[01:48] AG: You don't owe me anything.

[01:48] AG: Just go, alright?

[01:49] AT: yOUR UPSET THOUGH,

[01:49] AG: I'm not...

[01:49] AG: Fuck,

[01:49] AG: I don't care, okay?

[01:49] AG: I don't...

[01:49] AT: i DON'T KNOW WHAT i OWE YOU BUT i OWE YOU SOMETHING TO MAKE YOU BETTER,

[01:49] AT: yOU DO CARE THOUGH, i KNOW YOU DO,

[01:49] AT: i'VE SEEN YOU CARE,

[01:50] AG: ...

[01:50] AT: yOU ACT LIKE YOU DON'T BUT YOU DO,

[01:50] AG: Shut up...

[01:50] AG: I'm a huge 8itch,

[01:50:] AG: You know it.

[01:50] AT: nOT ALL THE TIME,

[01:51] AT: i'VE SEEN THE SIDE OF YOU THAT EVERYONE WANTS TO SEE,

[01:51] AG: Just get to the point already.

[01:51] AG: What do you want?

[01:51] AT: i DON'T KNOW, eVERYONE TO BE HAPPY i GUESS,

[01:52] AG: As much of a nice wish that is, it just won't happen.

[01:52] AG: Its impossi8le.

[01:52] AT: bUT MAYBE WE CAN ALL MAKE IT WORK,

[01:52] AG: How?

[01:53] AT: i DON'T KNOW, bUT WE COULD ALL FIGURE IT OUT TOGETHER,

[01:54] AG: It doesn't work like that, Tavros.

[01:54] AT: iT COULD THOUGH,

[01:54] AG: There's always going to 8e one person who is unhappy somehow.

[01:54] AG: Just let that person 8e me.

[01:54] AT: bUT IT ISN'T FAIR THOUGH,

[01:55] AG: It is,

[01:55] AG: Tavros, its just the natural order.

[01:55] AG: I can take it, really.

[01:55] AT: iT SHOULDN'T BE THAT WAY,

[01:55] AG: Stop,

[01:55] AG: Okay? Just stop.

[01:56] AG: Just leave me alone, already.

[01:56] AT: bUT YOUR JUST GOING TO BE UPSET,

[01:56] AT: i DON'T WANT TO,

[01:56] AG: It doesn't matter.

[01:56] AG: So 8e it if it means keeping everything the way it must.

[01:57] AG: I'm just fine.

[01:58] AT: sEE THATS THE SIDE i LIKE,,,yOU ARE WILLING TO BE UNHAPPY IF THAT MEEN EVERYONE ELSE HAVING IT ,

[01:59] AG: So?

[01:59] AT: tHATS WHAT i LIKE,

[01:59] AG: Whatever, Tavros.

[01:59] AT: nO HONEST,

[02:00] AG: ...I 8elieve you, just,

[02:00] AG: I don't even know what to do anymore.

[02:01] AT: wELL START WITH A BETTER ATTITUDE,

[02:01] AG: As soon as hell freezes over.

[02:01] AG: We 8oth know that's not happening.

[02:02] AT: wELL YOU COULD TRY,

[02:02] AG: There's nothing to 8e done a8out it.

[02:02] AG: You're going to upset the natural order.

[02:03] AT: sO?,

*_**up until this point I've been taking out the seconds NO MORE***_

[02:03:47] AT: wE'RE ALL DOOMED ANYWAY,

[02:03:51] AG: Its not right.

[02:04:06] AG: You can't change a 8itch.

[02:04:52] AT: yOUR NOT A BITCH,

[02:05:22] AG: Tavros...

[02:05:28] AG: Please...

[02:05:34] AG: Just stop...

[02:08:18] AT: nOT UNTILL YOU FEEL BETTER OR AT LEAST DECENT,

[02:08:38] AG: I'm fine,

[02:08:46] AG: I told you that already.

[02:13:56] AT: nO YOUR NOT THOUGH,

[02:14:10] AG: How the hell would you know?

[02:14:16] AG: I'm fine,

[02:14:18] AG: I promise.

[02:15:13] AT: i JUST DO,

[02:15:53] AG: Look, its nice that you give a shit a8out me, 8ut I don't need your sympathy.

[02:16:57] AT: i DON'T GIVE SYMPATHY VRISKA ,

[02:18:04] AT: iF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH,

[02:18:22] AT: i JUST WANT OTHERS TO FEEL BETTER BECAUSE i NEVER WILL,

[02:18:31] AG: What?

[02:20:26] AT: yOU READ IT RIGHT,

[02:22:11] AG: And why won't you feel any 8etter?

[02:23:36] AT: bECAUSE EVERYONE IGNORES ME AND WANTS ME TO WAIT ON THEM HAND AND FOOT SO BASICALLY i'M HERE FOR OTHERS,

[02:26:50] AG: ...Doesn't that make us sort of alike?

[02:28:31] AT: yEAH i GUESS,

[02:29:16] AG: Then take it.

[02:29:21] AT: i DO,

[02:29:33] AT: i AM PRETTY MUCH RAPED EVERY NIGHT BY GAMZEE,

[02:30:09] AG: Tav, just grow a 8ulge and tell him how you actually feel.

[02:31:07] AT: i CAN'T THOUGH,

[02:31:21] AG: Why the fuck not?!

[02:31:23] AT: eVERYTIME i TRY TO SAY SOMETHING TO HIM IT COMES OUT ALL WRONG,

[02:31:42] AG: Uggggggggh.

[02:31:48] AT: iT JUST MAKES IT WORSE,

[02:32:07] AG: There's no help for you.

[02:32:14] AG: I have no idea what to tell you.

[02:34:00] AT: sEE,

[02:34:44] AT: i WAS JUST SCREWED FROM THE START,

[02:35:45] AG: I'm sorry, you think I wasn't?

[02:35:53] AT: wE BOTH WERE,

[02:36:10] AT: iTS LIKE WE WERE THE ONES WHO JUST GOT SHAT ON BROUGHT TO LIFE,

[02:38:06] - arachnidsGrip [AG] sighs and just suddenly hugs you. -

[02:38:14] AG: I know, Tavros,

[02:38:16] - adiosToreador is a little shocked but hugs you back -

[02:38:17] AG: I know...

[02:39:06] AT: yEAH,

[02:39:55] AG: I'm sorry...

[02:40:03] AT: iTS FINE,

[02:40:09] AG: I'm just, I'm just gonna go, okay?

- arachnidsGrip [AG] ceased pestering adiosToreador at 02:40 -

[02:40:17] AT: vRISKA,

[02:40:29] AG: What?

[02:40:42] AT: pLEASE STAY,

[02:40:54] AG: ...

[02:43:16] AT: i MEAN IT,

[02:43:55] AG: Why?

[02:45:12] AT: bECAUSE YOU UNDERSTAND ME,

[02:45:35] AG: Tavros,

[02:45:43] AG: We know each other,

[02:45:53] AG: 8ut that doesn't mean jack shit.

[02:46:11] AG: I'm still a 8itch, and you're still a spineless pushover.

[02:47:34] AT: i'M NOT,

[02:47:48] AT: i WOULD HAVE YELLED AT YOU EARILER NOW WOULD i?,

[02:48:46] AG: Whatever.

[02:48:53] AG: It doesn't matter.

[02:49:38] AT: iT DOES THOUGH, tHATS WHAT i'VE BEEN GETTING AT THE WHOLE TIME,

[02:50:49] AG: Okay, whatever, I give up, okay?

[02:53:07] AT: i MEAN IT THOUGH,

[02:54:35] AG: I know,

[02:54:39] AG: Trust me, I do.

[02:54:45] AG: I just give up.

[02:55:21] AT: jUST PROMISE ME, yOU'LL BE MY FRIEND?,

[02:56:19] AG: I always have,

[02:56:25] AG: And pro8a8ly always will.

[02:56:44] AG: For what its worth, I'm sorry a8out your legs.

[02:57:31] AT: iTS OK, aT LEAST EQUIUS GAVE ME A ROBO PAIR,

[02:59:37] AG: And Tavros?

[02:59:40] AT: yEAH?,

[03:00:14] AG: Thanks...

[03:00:24] - arachnidsGrip [AG] abruptly hugs him tightly. -

[03:01:08] - adiosToreador hugs back and sighs -

[03:01:27] AG: I'm sorry...

[03:01:39] AG: I really think I should just go...

[03:03:01] AT: pLEASE DON'T,

[03:03:18] AT: i PROBABLY HAVE LIKE FIVE MORE MINUTES TILL i BLEED OUT,

[03:03:54] AG: Wait what?!

[03:05:07] AT: i'M PROBABLY JUST ON SOME DOOMED TIMELINE OR SOMETHING AND THE NEXT TIME YOU TO TALK TO ME IT WILL BE SOME CURRENT THING AND i WON'T REMEMBER ANYTHING BUT FOR NOW JUST KNOW WHAT i ACTUALLY THINK,

[03:05:56] AG: Ugggggggggh.

[03:05:59] AG: Fuck my life.

[03:06:12] AG: Why can't things just go right for once?

[03:07:02] AT: mAYBE THIS IS ACTUALLY MY TIME TO DIE SO BE HAPPY KNOWING i CHOOSE TO TALK TO YOU IN MY FINAL,

[03:08:19] AG: No, no, no, no, fucking no!

[03:08:31] AT: vRISKA ITS FINE,

[03:08:34] AG: Fuck you, fuck you so much for doing this!

[03:08:38] AG: ::::(

[03:08:59] AT: i DIND;T KNOW i WAS GOING TO DIE UNTILL FIVE MINUTES AGO,

[03:09:17] AT: i DIDN'T PLAN ON HIM COMING IN HERE AND DOING THIS,

[03:09:17] - arachnidsGrip [AG] shakes her head in tears. -

[03:09:39] AG: I don't even care anymore...

[03:09:51] AT: dON'T SAY THAT VRISKA,,,

[03:10:14] AG: Rest in peace, Tav.

[03:16:58] AT: i SWEAR,

[03:17:18] AG: What?

[03:17:32] AT: sOMEONE IS LOOKING FOR ME BECAUSE GAM JUST GOT HERE,

[03:17:43] AT: lOOKING OUT*,

[03:18:05] AG: Oh...

[03:18:14] - arachnidsGrip [AG] wipes her tears away. -

[03:19:13] AT: hE'S TRYING TO STOP THE BLEEDING,

[03:19:41] AG: Good...

[03:19:54] AG: Just, tell him thanks...

[03:20:01] AG: From Vriska...

[03:20:04] AT: aLRIGHT,

[03:20:55] AG: And as much as I want to stay, I really have to go now.

[03:21:18] AT: aLRIGHT, oNE MORE THING VRISKA,

[03:21:25] AG: Yeah?

[03:22:19] AT: i LOVE YOU,

[03:22:32] AG: ...

[03:22:36] AG: Yeah,

[03:22:44] AG: I know, Tav, I know...

[03:22:55] AG: I do too...

* * *

anyway thats the end, the rest was OOC because we wanted to find each other outside of pesterchum...Yeah those feels man. Those feels.


End file.
